Dear Akira...

13 min read

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xXTheBlackSheepXx's avatar
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Dear :iconblack-avenger:

I don't really know how to tell you this, but our affair is over. I think I realized it when we skinny dipped outside of Chicago and I saw you pour syrup on the crazy monk. I'm sure you're ashamed enough to understand that there is no solution to this. I'm returning your ring to you, but I'll keep my virginity as a memory. You should also know that I always will remember our friendship.

Go burn, :iconxxtheblacksheepxx:



You went too far with that syrup, waifu. Too far.

I guess my virginity is nothing but a memory now...

                                               

Instructions: so basically you answer the questions below and insert your answer into the numbers of the blank entry below ;D

Dear *person who tagged you*, 

I don't really know how to tell you this, but (1). I think I realized it when (2) (3) and I saw you (4) (5). I'm sure you're (6) enough to understand (7). I'm returning (8) to you, but I'll keep (9) as a memory. You should also know that I (10) (11).

(12), *your name*

                                               

  1. 1.What's the color of your shirt?
    Blue - Our romance is over
    Red - Our affair is over
    White - I'll join the monastery
    Black - I dislike you
    Green - Our horoscope doesn't match
    Grey - You're a pervert 
    Yellow - I'm selling myself
    Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
    Brown - The mafia wants you
    No shirt - You're a loser
    Other - I'm in love with your sister 

    2. Which is your birth month?
    January - That night
    February - Last year
    March - When your dwarf bit me
    April - When I tripped on sesame seeds
    May - First of May
    June - When you put cuffs on me
    July - When I threw up 
    August - When I saw the shrunken head
    September - When we skinny dipped
    October - When I quoted Santa
    November - When your dog ran amok
    December - When I changed tennis shoes

    3. Which food do you prefer?
    Tacos - In your apartment
    Pizza - In your camping car
    Pasta - Outside of Chicago 
    Hamburgers - Under the bus
    Salad - As you ate enchilada
    Chicken - In your closet
    Kabab - With Paris Hilton
    Fish - In women's clothing
    Sandwiches - At the Hare Krishna graduation
    Lasagna - At the mental hospital
    Hot dog - Under a state of trance
    None of the above - With George Bush and his wife

    4. What's the color of your socks?
    Yellow - Hit on
    Red - Insult
    Black - Ignore
    Blue - Knock out
    Purple - Pour syrup on
    White - Carve your initials into
    Grey - Pull the clothes off
    Brown - Put leeches on
    Orange - Castrate
    Pink - Pull the toupee off
    Barefoot - Sit on
    Other - Drive out

    5. What's the color of your underwear?
    Black - My best friend
    White - My father 
    Grey - Bill Clinton
    Brown - My fart balloon
    Purple - My mustard soufflé
    Red - Donald Duck
    Blue - My avocado plant
    Yellow - My penpal in Ghana 
    Orange - My Kid Rock-collection
    Pink - Manchester United's goalkeeper 
    None - My John F. Kennedy statue
    Other - The crazy monk

    6. What do you prefer to watch on TV?
    Scrubs - Man
    O.C. - Emotional
    One Tree Hill - Open
    Heroes - Frostbitten
    Lost - High
    House - Scarred
    Simpsons - Cowardly 
    The news - Mongolic
    Idol - Masochistic
    Family Guy - Senile
    Top Model - Middle-class
    None of the above – Ashamed 

    7. Your mood right now?
    Happy - How awful I've felt 
    Sad - How boring you are
    Bored - That Santa doesn't exist
    Angry - That your pimples are at the last stage
    Depressed - That we're cousins
    Excited - That there is no solution to this
    Nervous - The middle-east
    Worried - That your Honda sucks
    Apathetic - That I did a sex-change
    Ashamed - That I'm allergic to your hamster
    Cuddly - That I get turned on by garbage men
    Overjoyous - That I'm open
    Other - That Extreme Home Makeover sucks

    8. What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
    White - Your ring
    Yellow - Your love letters
    Red - Your Darth Vader-poster
    Black - Your tame stone
    Blue - The couch cushions 
    Green - The pictures from LA
    Orange - Your false teeth
    Brown - Your contact book
    Grey - Our matching snoopy-bibs
    Purple - Your old lottery coupons
    Pink - The cut toenails
    Other - Your memories from the military service

    9. The first letter of your first name?
    A/B - Your photo 
    C/D - The oil stocks
    E/F - Your neighbour Martin
    G/H - My virginity
    I/J - The results of your blood-sample
    K/L - Your left ear
    M/N - Your suicide note
    O/P - My common sense
    Q/R - Your mom
    S/T - Your collection of butterflies
    U/V - Your criminal record
    W/X - David's tricot outfits
    Y/Z - Your grades from college

    10. The last letter in your last name?
    A/B - Always will remember
    C/D - Never will forget
    E/F - Always wanted to break
    G/H - Never openly mocked
    I/J - Always have felt dirty before 
    K/L - Will tell the authorities about
    M/N - Told in my confession today about
    O/P - Was interviewed by the Times about
    Q/R - Told my psychiatrist about
    S/T - Get sick when I think of
    U/V - Always will try to forget
    W/X - Am better off without
    Y/Z - Never liked

    11. What do you prefer to drink?
    Water- Our friendship
    Beer - Senility
    Soft drink - A new life as a clone
    Soda - The incarnation as an eskimo
    Milk - The apartment building
    Wine - Cocaine abuse 
    Cider - A passionate interest for mice
    Juice - Oprah Winfrey imitations
    Mineral water - Embarrassing rash
    Hot chocolate - Eggplant-fetishism
    Whisky - To ruin the second world war
    Other - To hate the Boston Celtics

    12. To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
    Thailand - Warm regards
    USA - Best regards
    England - Good luck on your short-term leave from jail
    Spain - Go and drown yourself
    China - Disgusting regards
    Germany - With ease
    Japan - Go burn
    Greece - Your everlasting enemy
    Australia - Greetings to your frog Leonard
    Egypt - Fuck off now
    France - In pain
    Other - Greetings to your freaky family




I'm tagging lots of people because this is actually a really fun tag xD
:iconfollyfox: :iconsilly-finn: :iconitsukisakura: :iconpurbosky: :iconsadaharugin: :iconxkiiro-me: :iconaka-finley: :iconartsypurplepanda: :iconmoo-sicle: :iconeimtee: :iconvirmont89: :iconeniell: :iconrainatmosphere: :iconmorphicelus:

No pressure though! :)




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